The Quiet After The Storm...

What a gift from God it was to experience the evening of November 4, 2008 in America. My mind is still trying to wrap itself around the magnitude of what just happened. I will be able to tell this story a thousand times over and I am certain that it will never get old.

Ineffability is defined as: To say that something is "ineffable" means that it cannot or should not, for overwhelming reasons, be expressed in spoken words (as with the concept of true love). It is generally used to describe a feeling, concept or aspect of existence that is too great to be adequately described in words, or that inherently (due to its nature) cannot be conveyed in dualistic symbolic human language, but can only be known internally by individuals.
In Zen it is often said that (by analogy) the finger can point to the moon but is not the moon; likewise words and actions can point towards what is ineffable but cannot make another know it.


When I think of what happened yesterday, all I can do is cry. I thank God for giving me life and for allowing me to experience this moment in its fullness.

To anyone who has been made to feel an outsider, made to feel less than a full citizen, has been disrespected or accused of being guilty until proven innocent, who was told they could never succeed...today is YOUR day! Own it like it's always been yours. This is what the "other side of the mountain top" feels like. The possibilities are endless and every dream is a question of "when", and never "if".

But lest we forget those who've gone before us....

Gabriel Posser
Nat Turner
Harriet Tubman
Frederick Douglas
Marcus Garvey
The Scottsboro Nine
Medgar Evers
Emmitt Till
Ronald Madison (mentally handicapped man killed by N.O Police during Hurricane Katrina)
Bernie Mac
Jackie Robinson
Rosa Parks
Charles Steele
Denise McNair, Cynthia Wesley, Carole Robertson, and Addie Mae Collins
The Great Reverend Martin Luther King Jr.


And countless, and I do mean countless others...

With gratitude and humility...keep your torch lit

"Hey, I'm not racist...I'll have you know I have one black friend and he's very articulate..."

I published this post on July 4, 2009. I had started to write this post back in October of 2008. The hateful racist backlash had already begun as the writing was on the wall that Obama would win the presidency. I shelved this post mainly because the topic of racism is so broad and so far-reaching that I truly did not know how to begin to write about it much less find a conclusion. As far as we've come since the Civil Rights Movement is as far as we still need to go to truly say that, "All men are created equal." Perhaps having a black man as the most powerful man in the free world will unearth the last remaining seeds of racism and thereby begin a new field in which true love and tolerance will flourish.

The excitement that has been swirling since Sonia Sotomayor's nomination to the Supreme Court has been nothing short of a compelling anthropological study of white conservative America. Both Limbaugh and Gingrich, cross-cultural icons and open-minded drug and sex addicts respectively, labeled Sotomayor as a racist. Reverse racist to be exact. For those of you who are not racist and/or are not familiar with the term "reverse racist", allow me to enlighten you.


The term is usually heard on Fox News or on Hannity /Limbaugh radio shows. It is a pathetic attempt at self-pity by white men when any minority person exhibits any form of empowerment or shows pride in their ethnic background; or when a minority person accomplishes greatness or earns a position of power and refuses to honor the "white privilege", such person is viewed as ungrateful and is accused of being a "reverse racist". How blatant the double-standard is in America: when a white male achieves the office of Senator, President or Supreme Court Justice, he has done so through hard work, dedication and intellect. When a minority person accomplishes the exact same positions, that person has "obviously benefited from living in America and should be thankful he/she even had the opportunity." Note to minority person: this is why you're held to a different standard. Mark Sanford and John Ensign will still have careers after their respective scandals. Minorities don't.

The central issue that seems to generate the most discussion is Sotomayor's comment from 2001 during a speech at Berkeley (terrorist factory) where she said, "I would hope that a wise Latina woman, with the richness of her experiences, would more often than not reach a better conclusion than a white male who hasn't lived that life."

So, is she saying that someone who has lived in a wider, broader and deeper spectrum of America, a latina woman who has been in the depths of poverty (usually reserved for minorities and typically where you find the most crime) and had not only been on welfare but eventually got to rub shoulders with white men at Princeton, would not have a better background to base decisions on than an affluent, white male who has never been within 10 miles of a (insert state) Department of Economic Security Office, who grew up in an all-white country club, who had never been in a car that wasn't made that same year (unless it was a vintage Mercedes) or who always thought the house in the Hamptons was "roughing it"?

Where could Sotomayor have gotten the juevos to say this? As Lindsey Graham so naively and racially put it, "And if I had said something like that--or someone with my background and profile--we wouldn't be talking about this nomination going forward." Ummm...yeah we would. Because white men have done that for centuries. They just never had to say it out loud. Our country was founded by white men, the laws were written by white men, white men were the only persons allowed to vote for the first 140 years of our country's existence, white men are 97% more likely to hail a cab in New York City.

So, yes, a Latina woman with an experience similar to Sotomayor's does come to a better decision than a white male who lacks that broad background of America's cultural landscape. We white males live in a fairly confined, narrow scope in America. When is the last time any of you took a stroll down the worst neighborhood in your city at night? Didn't keep the collar popped on the Polo, did ya? How about that liquor store on the corner in the ghetto...? Ever stop and ask for directions? No? Why not?

How many Fox News broadcasters are black? (Juan Williams doesn't count...Sheppard Smith is blacker than he is.) How many are Latino? Okay, Geraldo, but he's part-time.

But the right will respond that Michael Steele is the head of the Republican National Committee and I think I did see 3 or 4 persons of color at the Republican National Convention and they weren't just security guards...they were actually delegates. It appears as though they are making progress.

Sounds like they need a community organizer.

UPDATE: 7/14/09

The chairman of the Republican Party, house negro Michael Steele, just dropped this gem of a quote, watch the video in the link below:

Michael Steele decides he can "woo blacks to the GOP with fried chicken and potato salad"

Just when you think it couldn't get worse...the Republicans come through with a grand slam!

The NeoConned assault on Lady Justice: The frightening trend of proving false negatives

America. Land of the free, home of the brave. America. Home to the world's best example of equal justice. For centuries we have operated under the warm blanket of "innocent until proven guilty". Prosecutors are required to prove their case beyond a reasonable doubt to a jury of 12 fellow citizens who have been selected at random.

Have there been times when the guilty have gone free? Yes. Have there been times when the innocent were found guilty? Yes. The system is not perfect. It does walk in some faithful harmony with our Constitution and the Bill of Rights. Our Founding Fathers believed in humanity for all citizens of the world. This is why you will not find an indirect or direct reference to "U.S. citizens" in the Bill of Rights. For it is a document which outlines what the government can and cannot do against any people of any nation on earth (yes, even members of al-Qaeda!)

The American justice system is currently broken. It used to be that one was presumed innocent until proven guilty. In eight short years the Neoconned have abducted and assaulted our Lady of Justice. The result: if you are not a registered Republican, neoconservative and/or Fox News watcher, you are now presumed guilty until you are proven innocent. Yes, this has happened. Let's take a look back starting on September 12, 2001.

It is considered common knowledge at this point that the Iraq War was essentially planned prior to Bush's inauguration. 9/11 was simply a catalyst to be able to invade Iraq on ridiculously thin intelligence and the brilliant strategy of fear-mongering. When the U.S. were forced to comply to some set of rules laid out by the UN, they requested that Iraq provide intelligence and documentation on its weapons of mass destruction program. When Iraq complied and submitted a 19,000 page document, we conveniently erased the parts that stated that they did not have a WMD program and then asked Iraq again to come clean...or cleaner? Iraq clearly did not have WMD. However, when you send 150,000 troops to the Gulf to "negotiate diplomatically" it becomes increasingly difficult to continue to search (and be patient) for the truth.

Iraq continued to deny that they possessed WMD (most likely due to the fact that they did not have any). We still refused to accept that claim. This is perhaps the first instance of forcing someone, in this case an entire country, to prove a false negative; that is to say, that Iraq was clearly presumed guilty and ultimately was unable to prove its innocence.

As we are discovering on almost a daily basis, the U.S. knew that Iraq did not have WMD. In fact, as early as February of 2001 both Colin Powell and Condi Rice stood before the American public and claimed beyond doubt that Iraq had ceased to produce WMD and that they currently DID NOT possess any operational WMD.

There have been thousands of cases, obviously on a smaller scale, where this fascist system of justice has been present. Wiretapping, torture, denying prisoners habeas corpus are all elements of this upended American ideal. Persons who have spoken out against the war are on the government No Fly List. Protesters have been arrested for no reason other than exercising their constitutional rights. This perversion of real justice is a small but significant step in the direction of transforming a democratic state into a fascist state.

But recently this evil ideology has permeated the presidential race. Because the Republican party is unable to run on any type of solution-based platform, they are now forced to run on personal attacks, rumors and fear-mongering. The Republicans have hugged tightly to the various associations that Barack Obama has had prior to his candidacy. William Ayers, Sal Olinsky, Reverend Wright, the Chicago Cubs and ACORN (okay, not the Cubs but hey, Fox News spares no one in their attempt to start rumors) are the top four words you will hear on Fox News. Forget Osama bin Laden...no, seriously, I mean, I know we're not looking for him and we've already forgotten about him but forget about him again.

You would think these individuals have been responsible for events such as but not limited to: 9/11, the economy, the No Billionaire Left Behind Education Program, the housing crisis, Jamie Lynn Spears getting pregnant, blocking off-shore drilling, gas prices, Larry Craig's bathroom sex sting operation and for giving reporters tricky questions to ask Sarah Palin; questions like, "What newspapers do you read on a daily basis?"

Because Obama has met these individuals on few occasions or has had some type of brief relationship with them, he is presumed guilty and now must prove his innocence.

Here's the predicament. He has explained the connections on numerous occasions. The facts show that he is telling the truth. But since he is being forced to prove a false negative, he is unable exonerate himself.

It is similar to someone accusing you of being in a certain place on a certain day. They didn't see you there but they report the incident as if it were factual. You are then forced to prove something that is false. You are forced to prove you were not there but perhaps you can't because you were home alone during the evening in question. Amazing, isn't it? Our whole system of justice turned upside down. Imagine how court cases would play out. Would anyone be innocent ever again??

What exacerbates this particular situation is when this is played out in the public court of opinion and when the situation involves the future of our country. We are faced with going backwards or moving forward out of the most miserable eight years of our country's existence. We are forced with moving closer to a fascist state of government where the Constitution will continue to be sodomized and civil liberties be stripped away or returning to our fundamental principles that are clearly outlined in the Constitution.

Democracy is an interactive exercise. Let's put the blindfold back on Lady Justice.

"Constitution first, Country second"

The New Right-Wing Guide to Profanity

Under the Bush Regime the right-wing lemming movement has not only hijacked country music, the Constitution, the right to cheer for the military and the goatee, but it appears as though they have begun an aggressive assault on the English vocabulary.

It is understood that here in Amirca (Bush pronunciation) we have a certain slang in our representation of the English language. From Texas to Arkansas and from Missouri to southeastern Georgia, you will find an infinite number of different accents coupled with regional expressions that violate nearly every grammatical rule. But they are undoubtedly OUR expressions.

We thought they would have been satisfied with this. Apparently they're not.



The right-wing and its Hall of Justice, Fox News, have cornered several meaningful words and have deemed them blasphemous. The very existence of these words is threatened! (Not sure which color the terror level meter would be...probably a burnt orange or scarlet red).

The following 10 words have been kidnapped by the right wing. The problem: they have no idea of their meaning but they use them in emergency situations like an eject button in a fighter plane right before impact.

If you see a right-wing lemming using these words, usually in the midst of a Sean Hannity talking point, call your local English teacher or librarian and report them immediately.



1.) Socialist

Actual meaning: Of or pertaining to a political and economic theory or system of social organization based on collective or state ownership of the means of production, distribution, and exchange. Like capitalism, it takes many and diverse forms.

Right-Wing meaning: "Means that you wanna give away all my stuff to somebody else and I have to pay more money for stuff I ain't got no more. All them librals is socialists. Like in Europe and stuff."

I will now use the word socialist in a sentence: Being unable to express individual thoughts and be recognized for them is indicative of a socialist intellectualism.

2.) Marxist

Actual meaning: Of or pertaining to the political and economic philosophy of Karl Marx and Friedrich Engels in which the concept of class struggle plays a central role in understanding society's allegedly inevitable development from bourgeois oppression under capitalism to a socialist and ultimately classless society.

Right-Wing meaning: "It's that one guy with the long beard who wanted to everyone to get the same haircut and then share their meals together. What a crazy kook! This here is one of Obama's buddies. They drank that funky tea together in Chicago while they was talkin' 'bout bein' radical and stuff."

I will now use the word marxist in a sentence: Marxist natural process is clearly represented during the eight long years under the Bush Regime; the working class has experienced new depths of poverty while the wealthy have experienced incredible growth in their net worth.

3.) Communist

Actual meaning: Of or pertaining to a system of government in which the state plans and controls the economy and a single, often authoritarian party holds power, claiming to make progress toward a higher social order in which all goods are equally shared by the people.

Right-Wing meaning: "Soviet Union, vodka and Ivan Drago from Rocky IV. Far as I'm concerned, anybody who don't think Amirca is #1 in everything is a communist."

I will now use the word communist in a sentence: The federal financial rescue package passed by Congress is almost communist: we all share in the debt and risk but only Wall Street gets the rewards.

4.) Radical

Actual meaning: Departing markedly from the usual or customary; extreme: radical opinions on education. Favoring or effecting fundamental or revolutionary changes in current practices, conditions, or institutions: radical political views.

Right-Wing meaning: "Freak! Why you wanna go changin' everything around? Damn it! You librals bein' for peace and equality...y'all just a bunch of radical radicals and stuff."

I will now use the word radical in a sentence: To be for torture, wiretapping and eliminating habeas corpus is a radical shift from the fundamental principles of our Constitution.

5.) Liberal

Actual meaning: Not limited to or by established, traditional, orthodox, or authoritarian attitudes, views, or dogmas; free from bigotry.Favoring proposals for reform, open to new ideas for progress, and tolerant of the ideas and behavior of others; broad-minded. Of, relating to, or characteristic of liberalism.

Right-Wing meaning: "Sean Hannity and Bill O'Reilly told me that librals is just another word for traitor. You librals wantin' all that peace, freedom and equality. Well guess what...freedom ain't free and these colors don't run. I got yer tolerance for other people's ideas right here...!"

I will now use the word liberal in a sentence: Thomas Jefferson, Benjamin Franklin, John Adams and John Hancock were all signatories of the Declaration of Independence and were all very liberal men.

6.) Global

Actual meaning: Of, relating to, or involving the entire earth; worldwide: global war; global monetary policies.

Right-Wing meaning: "Who cares about the rest of the global peoples? Only thing that matters is the Global War of Terror that Amirca is bringin' to other parts of globe. Hey, if you don't come to democracy then democracy is comin' to you! Yee-haw! We gotta figure out a way to get the globe to cooperate with us. We're Amirca, damn it!"

I will now use the word global in a sentence: In an effort to speed up global warming, Governor Sarah Palin pushes for more drilling in the Arctic Wildlife Natural Refuge and continues to push for the extinction of polar bears in order to achieve it.

7.) European

Actual meaning: A person, object or attribute of the continent of Europe, the European Union, or a descendent of a European ethnic group or of a European person.

Right-Wing meaning: "People who talk funny, don't take showers or shave, eat weird food and listen to classical music. Fox News calls 'em elitists!"

I will now use the word European in a sentence: My experience has been that an average European citizen has more geographical knowledge of the United States than do most Americans.

8.) Fair

Actual meaning: Having or exhibiting a disposition that is free of favoritism or bias; impartial: a fair mediator. Just to all parties; equitable: a compromise that is fair to both factions. Being in accordance with relative merit or significance: She wanted to receive her fair share of the proceeds. Consistent with rules, logic, or ethics: a fair tactic.

Right-Wing meaning: "Fox News is fair and balanced. Who' da thunk it that Obama was a Muslim AND he had a crazy Christian pastor at the same time?"

I will now use the word fair in a sentence: When a political party rigs voting machines and threatens potential voters of the rival candidate, one can say that an election of this sort would not be fair.

9.) Community Organizer

Actual meaning: Community organizers create social movements by building a base of concerned people, mobilizing these community members to act, and developing leadership from and relationships among the people involved.

Right-Wing meaning: "Community organizers are a bunch of radicals trying to help other people, kinda like a socialist, and these organizers try to get them off poverty and stuff, teach 'em how to get a skill or something. Not quite sure...I heard Sarah Palin make a joke about it at the convention and everyone get a kick out of it! I guess it's just a bunch of people who ain't got nuthin' better to do than to help other people."

I will now use the term community organizer in a sentence: Jesus Christ was a liberal community organizer.

10.) Feminist

Actual meaning: Belief in the social, political, and economic equality of the sexes; the radical notion that females are human beings and are equal to men.

Right-Wing meaning: "Kinda like when a female wants to become special; you know, like when you're in the finals of a competition, then you're a finalist. Same thing here: a female becomes a feminist. All it takes is nice pair o' legs, a uterus and the occasional wink at me here in the audience."

I will now use the word feminist in a sentence: To say that Sarah Palin is a feminist would be to say that Dick Cheney is a philanthropist.



To everyone: take back these words and their meaning, take back your democracy from those who threaten it and continue to be truth-seekers.

The "maverick" who got lost...

Arizona Senator John McCain calls himself a "maverick". I'm not entirely certain why he chooses that label, perhaps because he represents the state of Arizona and therefore he can be viewed as some type of mascot for the state which is famous for old western movies. Tombstone, Prescott and Jerome are all cities in Arizona that conjure up images of an old man on a horse, trudging through the desert while building fires and eating beans out of a can. Yes sir, the old west. Kill or be killed.

I became curious about the meaning of the word "maverick".
A very wise professor from graduate school always suggested to begin with the word itself. Often times there is a whole other world of meaning within the letters of a word that can reveal its true nature and unlock the truth surrounding it. So, I searched for the definition of "maverick" on google.com and this is what came up:

1. An unbranded range animal, especially a calf that has become separated from its mother, traditionally considered the property of the first person who brands it.
2. One that refuses to abide by the dictates of or resists adherence to a group; a dissenter

My best educated guess is that most uneducated and uninformed (and misinformed) people view John McCain as a "maverick" in the # 2 part of the definition; someone who doesn't follow the group just to follow but rather blazes his/her own trail and by default can be considered a leader (provided that others follow).

I could dissect that theory faster than my friend Claudio can dissect a veal shank and I could now jump into the 61 positions and counting in which John McCain has been anything BUT someone who goes his own way, or has his own personal convictions despite how others may view him. From the Iraq withdrawal timetable to Bush's tax cuts to off-shore drilling, John McCain changes his mind as quickly as a pregnant woman does when deciding what to have for lunch. Asking Senator McCain to stick to his position is like asking Dick Cheney to reveal his e-mail inbox. Simply put, it would be asking that the impossible become possible.

But let us examine the # 1 part of the definition within the scope of John McCain and the party to which he claims affiliation: Republican.

It is rarely argued that on September 11, 2001, the world changed forever. One of the major changes was within the Republican party of the United States of America. Prior to September 11, 2001, the Republican party was (in)famous for opposing gay marriage, opposing rights of women to have control over their own human bodies, labeling poverty and homosexuality as "choices", believing that Jesus Christ was both Republican and American, pro- big business/corporatism, pro-tobacco industry and pro-big oil, over-taxation of middle-class, etc. Basically, the Reagan agenda was their coat of arms. (trickle-down means pissed-on)

But it appears as though the Republican party encountered a fracture, a type of rupture in its structure, where certain individuals developed an entirely different agenda that was much more devastating on a global basis and the new agenda reeked of nationalistic and fascist ideologies.

This movement, the NeoConservative, or more affectionately called, "NeoConned", looked to gain complete control of the military, judicial, legislative and executive components (not to mention, state's rights) of our nation's government by instituting a propagandistic strategy not seen since that of Hitler's regime in Germany 1936.

From 2001 - 2007 I would have not classified John McCain as one of the NeoConned. In this sense, he could very well have been labeled a "maverick" for not joining in the NeoCon passion of torture, illegal war and the sodomy of the Constitution.

But 2007 is when the so-called "maverick" became a calf (naive and willing to do anything for love) that had become separated from its mother (his party's traditional ideologies), and thereby considered the property of the first person who brands it (the NeoCons branded him with this image, "$$"). John McCain decided to run for president in 2008, perhaps to erase that awful image of him hugging George Bush in that 2000 photo when he could not resist snuggling his nose in Bush's neck.

John McCain was a calf that had decided to stray from his traditional Reagan Republican herd. He stumbled upon the NeoConned who quickly put their brand on him and are now showing him off at the local 4-H fairs nationwide. He says what they want him to say: torture is fine sometimes, especially if you watch "24" and how Kiefer Sutherland handles those "ticking time bomb" scenarios, off-shore drilling makes perfect sense, tax cuts for the richest 3% of America are a good idea while the middle and lower classes are taking it in the poopenschaft and at a time when gas has hit the same price as a meal for two at Burger King, 100 years in Iraq is a fantastic idea and bombing Iran and starting ANOTHER ILLEGAL PREEMPTIVE WAR makes sense when we have no proof or evidence that the Iranians have violated any law whatsoever.

In conclusion, perhaps the title of "maverick" is wildly suitable for McCain. He has, in fact, strayed from his proverbial mother. But he accomplished that way back in 1973 when he returned from Vietnam after 5 1/2 grueling years as a P.O.W. He discovered his once attractive, swim wear model and first wife Carol had been in a terrible car accident 3 years prior to his return. The accident left her disfigured and not so "bikini-liscious".

The man of values and principles left his disfigured and debilitated wife Carol and began an affair with the Bud Light Girl, Cindy, who is his current wife. In fact, "maverick" applied for a marriage license to marry Cindy before he finalized his divorce to Carol. Holy Maverick, you say...here's the undisputed link.

At this point, both Ronald and Nancy Reagan lost a great deal of respect for John McCain and went as far as to provide financially for Carol for many years to follow. When Nancy Reagan was asked to endorse John "The Maverick" McCain, she was quoted, "Well, obviously, this is the nominee of the party." I would say that is an endorsement dripping with enthusiasm.

John, you are no maverick. The only thing you have in common is that you share three of the same letters of the alphabet. You are simply a calf who got lost and are now being raised by angry, violent wolves. You are doomed either way.

If you fail in your mission, they will eat you. If you succeed in your mission, they will eat your mother.

Rome was neither built nor conquered in one day...

Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter.

---Martin Luther King Jr.

It's been a while since my last post. So much has happened over such a short amount of time. It's becoming increasingly evident that the right has truly kidnapped America and what she stands for. To speak out about America and to exhibit any trace of disappointment over the actions of our government is now classified as "hate speech"; that is, if you're black and living in America....

A great country rarely falls from foreign threats but rather from within. As Sinclair Lewis once wrote, "When fascism comes to America it will be wrapped in a flag and carrying a cross."
Here are some reflections on recent events.

1. Reverend Jeremiah Wright = With the right-wing lemmings being so appalled at his sermons, which take place daily in thousands of churches from coast to coast, it would then be only logical to say that these same people are then VERY PROUD of the following "accomplishments" of that same government Reverend Wright criticized: torture, illegal war, declining benefits for veterans, ill-equipped soldiers, genocide of Native-Americans, genocide of African-Americans, enslavement of Africans, lynching of African-Americans, sexism, racism, discrimination, religious intolerance, attempted destruction of labor unions, Japanese internment camps, fire hoses and German shepherds on African-American citizens in Alabama, segregation, agent-provocateurs who incite riots during peaceful protests, the use of military aircraft to transport heroin from southeast Asia into the United States...and the list can go on until the next Microsoft program comes out.

Now, I'm one of the few, perhaps, who believe that there is a stark difference between my government and my country. America is synonymous with freedom and equality. America is the Constitution, not the government. When the president of this country takes his/her oath, it is not to "protect the American people" but rather "...solemnly swear (or affirm) that I will faithfully execute the Office of President of the United States, and will to the best of my ability, preserve, protect and defend the Constitution of the United States."
What the right-wing jackasses are playing on the radio is actually helping Reverend Wright. As they continue to play only sound bites and snippets of his entire sermon, Reverend Wright continually refers to "the Government" and not to "America". But you won't hear that unless you look for the entire sermon on the internet somewhere. When a black man criticizes America he's considered a hateful ingrate and a traitor; when a white man does it they call it anger peppered with wisdom and conservatism.

2. Hillary = The person inside her body is a right-wing nut job dressed in a business suit and armed with the most annoying laugh in the history of mankind. From wanting to annihilate Iran and wipe it off the map to employing fear tactics to claiming that since Obama had a pacifier until the age of 2 she is better suited to be president on Day One, this woman has made Karl Rove look like Mr. Rogers. Her arithmetic is so much of a twisting fantasy that you would need at least 3 hits of acid and 1 bag of shrooms to partially grasp the hint of possibility that she may win the nomination. The damage that she has done is immeasurable and was totally unnecessary. She has distracted Obama enough to let McCain go untouched for at least 8 weeks now. Surprisingly though, despite the negativity and adolescent attacks by Hillary, McCain has a mere 3 point lead over either Democrat. I can't wait to see Obama destroy McCain in a debate. Maybe "my friend" will get so fired up that the red face will beautifully contrast the white hair...the fist will start pumping and that mechanical arm will go all crazy and start flapping and then...aaahhh...one can only hope.
Hillary's cult followers have now promised to vote for McCain over Obama should Obama get the nomination. Brilliant. Maybe that was the plan all along.
Her tactic is cunning. Attack mercilessly and childishly and when Barrack fires back then play the victim. This country still gets fired up when a black man speaks in a harsh tone to or about a white woman.

3. Rush Limbaugh= Definition: overweight, insecure megalomaniac drug-addict who encourages his lemming listeners to switch parties and vote for Hillary in the primary and then go to Denver and riot when Obama does not get the nomination.
There is no one on the radio who is more overtly racist, sexist and elitist than Rush Limbaugh. To so many who have removed the frontal lobe region of their brain, Rush (and Sean Hannity) is their source of reason. The right-wing lemmings have made Rush their cult leader. I mean, you'd have to call him that if he's encouraging people to go to Denver to riot in August and they are willing to get arrested to do it.
This is so tragic and this is part of the problem in America today; we rely on the media to interpret information that is so incredibly easy to comprehend. 9/11 took our breath away and the right-wing gave us an oxygen mask that pumped us full of fear gas. Some were able to wiggle out of the mask; others still have not and are now addicted and can't live without it.

4. Iran = If you want war bad enough, I'm sure it will happen. The Bush Crime Family has been itching to lob some missiles into Iran. McCain can't wait to bomb it and Hillary wants to obliterate it. Don't be surprised if you wake up one morning in the next 30 days and see Breaking News where Iran "provoked a U.S. carrier" --most likely we parked a battleship on one of their beaches in Akhtar and then say, "They threatened us"---or "the U.S. intercepted communication". More war, more money, more death, more oil, more troops, more torture, more rape, more murder, more military contracts for Carlyle Group, Haliburton and Boeing, more coffins, more grief, $4 a gallon gas....and less safe than ever. And don't forget: we're supposed to be looking for Bin Laden.


I never thought I'd be living in America and writing these types of thoughts I just put forth.
9/11 didn't unite us; it divided us and the Bush Crime Family made sure of it. When will people stand up and say they've had enough? At the sake of expanding an empire we are on the verge of losing the republic...

Stuff right-wingers like...

I recently stumbled across another blog entitled stuff white people like. The blog is genius and I laughed so hard my stomach hurt for the rest of the day. I check it frequently as, despite its clever humor, it delivers poignant observations about the Caucasian race in America.

With that in mind I wanted to do an entry on stuff right-wingers like.

This is going to be the most fun-filled post I've done since the inception of the blog.

Disclaimer: This list could grow or diminish in size. The list is not intended to capture all of the objects of pleasure of the right-wing lemmings but merely underscore the principal commonalities. Their condition, or dis-ease if you will, can only be cured by an icon who is a respected military authority, a champion driver on the NASCAR circuit or in the country music industry who would be willing to reveal the truth to them: that they have been duped and that the Bush Crime Family screwed them, too.

Let the fun begin...

Patriotic country music

This is perhaps the most common. Any song that speaks of America kickin' ass, that the "Red, white and blue are comin' fer you too" or of 9/11 (usually in the form of a ballad) is pretty mainstay for the average right-winger. They may have a compilation of this type of music on CD or multiple CD's. At any rate these CD's are readily available and easily accessible in their vehicles. You may have heard some of these songs as they tend to roll their windows down in their vehicle and play the music at a high volume when cruising. The music can evoke a wide array of emotions, from rage to sadness to grief. Bottom line: necessary for nutrition for the blindly patriotic.

Patriotic (allegedly) t-shirts

For the average right-winger the choice in apparel is paramount. Having the right t-shirt can make or break their night out. There are many choices. T-shirts with the following slogans/designs are generally considered chic: "These colors don't run", "Let the eagle soar", "Freedom ain't free", "Bin Laden we're comin' for your ass" (usually with Uncle Sam as the protagonist), "Unleash the military - Give war a chance", "I Love Waterboarding", "I love torturing terrorists", "Peace through superior firepower". These t-shirts come in many colors, too. It's important for the average right-winger to wear these classics by tucking them into their Wrangler BLUE jeans with either broken-in cowboy boots or a pair of tennis shoes (NOT running shoes...remember, "these colors don't run").

Trucks

Big. Loud. Ford. Dodge. These four words mean a lot to the average right-winger. They basically stand for, "I'm gonna kick yer ass whether you want me to or not". The choice in trucks says a lot about the average right-winger. They know that it takes $182.75 to fill up the gas tank but that is not a statement of their wealth but rather of their arrogance and disdain for anything environmental (how could you be an avid fan of war AND be an avid fan of the environment at the same time?)
The younger lemmings tend to choose a flashy, 25-foot high truck with flashy rims and an outrageous bumper sticker like, "I'd rather be in a CIA secret prison waterboarding a terrorist". The older, more sophisticated right-winger tends to have a Ford F150 extended cab with responsible tires and rims, no more than 2.5 feet from floorboard to the ground and a "W 04" sticker or a "Bush/Cheney 04" sticker. They may (and this is probable) have a front decorative license plate that is of the American flag or of a bald eagle or they may have an American flag windsock out of their back driver side window. Whether it is the young buck right-winger or the homophobic older type, they both keep their trucks 5 levels above operating-room cleanliness. Trucks are to right-wingers as Volvos are to liberals: a mutual sign of fraternal order.

American flag lapel pins

Who would have thought that those American flag lapel pins you can buy at Chevron, Circle K or 7-11 would become so incredibly popular and be considered so sacred and patriotic? Well, believe it. These little suckers can go anywhere, not only your lapel. You can put them on hats, scarves, vests, ties, backpacks and they go great on any apparel from Cabela's or Bass Pro Shops.

If you do not own one of these, and the average right-winger owns more than one, you are immediately classified as a terrorist and hateful towards America and anything American.
You can also be accused of communist tendencies and, although you may know nothing about the Muslim religion, a Muslim extremist who owns many sandals and plenty of curry at home.

The flag lapel pin is akin to Popeye's spinach. If you find yourself in a precarious situation and in need of displaying deep, meaningful patriotism, then bust it out and slap it on so everyone can see how sincere you truly are.

Bill O'Reilly and Sean Hannity

To the average right-winger these two propagandistic deities are in the realm of demagogues. If O'Reilly and/or Hannity were to advocate violence towards any Democrat we would find ourselves in a type of Armageddon previously only seen in movies. Both Hannity and O'Reilly have hypnotic power over the average right-winger. These men supply the weak, empty talking points to millions of right-wingers daily.
If you hear terms like "SP" or "selective moral outrage" then you know you have encountered one of these lemmings. Just know that any type of truth, data or factual evidence is virtually useless against these individuals. Their perspective is dependent on false accusations, fear-mongering, judgment, hate and ignorance. There is absolutely no room for truth in this world.
The average right-winger makes desperate daily attempts to convince others that their talking points were not gathered from Hannity or O'Reilly. They are usually confronted on this when debating with progressives but when they are in the company of other average right-wingers, both parties pretend not to know that the other is actually regurgitating verbatim what Hannity and O'Reilly said the day before.

More war (battleground TBD)

The only thing better than the Iraq war would be more war. The target country is rather unimportant. What is important for the average right-winger is that when there appears to be a lull in violence that the Bush Crime Family find another country, and quickly, that is not a threat and bomb it back to primitive times. The reason for more war could and will change according to facts and truth that are uncovered. Example: supposedly we went into Iraq because, according to intelligence, they had weapons of mass destruction and they were going to use them against us in the near future ("can't let the smoking gun be in the form of a mushroom cloud"). When it was discovered (proven) that Iraq DID NOT have WMD the mission changed to "removing a brutal dictator". When Saddam was executed, then it became, "spreading democracy".
Intelligence reports have concluded that Iran does not have a WMD program. You know what that means? Iran is next on the list.
There is an adolescent excitement that exists here, similar to Christmas Eve, and it most likely is very related to my previous blog entry and the average right-winger's obsession and love of the military.

NASCAR

I am convinced that there is not one NASCAR fan who is, or ever was, against any war---past, present or future. To watch identical cars go around in a circle and wait for them to crash can say a lot about someone's view of the world in general. The ultimate weekend for an average right-winger: going to a NASCAR race with your friends where all of the attendees have trucks, patriotic t-shirts, tight Wranglers, patriotic country music, lots of Busch beer and when overly-intoxicated, closet homosexual tendencies.
Being an average right-winger and being a NASCAR fan are nearly syllogistic in nature. Ultimate orgasmic moment: having your driver win the NASCAR race and do the victory lap with a gigantic American flag.

"Truthiness" and general disdain for facts and truth

Stephen Colbert coined the term truthiness a while back. Here's the definition according to wikipedia:
"a satirical term to describe things that a person claims to know intuitively or "from the gut" without regard to evidence, logic, intellectual examination, or facts."
This phenomenon has permeated nearly every aspect of the average right-winger's world. Real truth, to them, is simply abhorrent. When presented with evidence and facts, such as the fact that Iraq had no WMD or that the "surge" is really the U.S. government offering huge payments to al-Sadr's army to temporarily cease violence, the average right-winger will become enraged and offer his/her brand of "truthiness": "That's bullshit! Everyone knows that Saddam had WMD and that he smuggled them into Syria before the invasion, my neighbor's kid is in the Marines and he has satellite images of it. No one can see them yet because they're classified, but they will come out someday. And the surge is working because we've got more soldiers there then we ever had and we're killing more of them!!!" Facts: we have less soldiers there now then we did pre-surge, we are paying Muqtada al-Sadr large sums of money to remain idle and to this moment in time there have been no WMD found in Iraq. Those are facts. But the average right-winger cannot tolerate facts and therefore relies on what his/her truth is, which is "truthiness".
In all seriousness I believe this boils down to a psychological defense mechanism that prevents someone from having a nervous breakdown. If the average right-winger were to face the truth and facts regarding Iraq, let's say, the truth would be literally crippling: both psychologically as well as emotionally.
"Truthiness" can also be applied to the above topic of pretending to be or pretending to have been in the military. As Joseph Goebbels once said, "If you tell a big enough lie enough times people will come to believe it."

Submissive wives

No surprise here. The average right-winger male needs his wife to be submissive and thoughtless, but yet the ultimate caregiver for the children. As he engages in deep political, philosophical debates such as "What type of bomb would you drop on Baghdad, bunkerbuster or clusterbomb?" and "Do you think Al-Qaeda was kinda responsible for Hurricane Katrina, too?" the submissive wife is close by, listening attentively so that she may relay these illogical and nonsensical points to her girlfriends and to various radio talk-shows (Hannity or O'Reilly) when the husband is away at work during the day. Perhaps the submissive wife achieves the highest form of unconditional love: when she would be willing and competent enough to disable the part of her brain that allows her the ability to reason so that it will instead simply and automatically validate and affirm the husband with robot-like frequency.
During one of the philosophical discourses on the Iraq war and while in the presence of the husband the submissive wife is not allowed to change the subject, interrupt the husband or to offer too radical of an opinion. The expectation is simply that a head-nod or a "mmmmhuh" will be more than sufficient. Typically the submissive wife will don the same gear (only one size smaller) as the average right-winger husband: patriotic t-shirt, tennis shoes, tight Wranglers (stonewashed). Other necessary components include Wrigley's Xtra gum, Marlboro lights, heavy makeup, teased hair, perfume from 1993, manicured nails with American flag emblem on each fingernail, drinking beer from bottle sans glass.

Television show "24"

The television show "24" allows the average right-winger to engage in their fantasy at least once a week: the country is under attack and there is ticking-time bomb scenario and only Jack Bauer can torture the suspect enough to save America. This is what is feeding the average right-winger's view of the Global War of Terror. This is what validates their "shoot first, ask questions much later" mentality. To them al-Qaeda is in the process of procuring dozens of canoes in order to row to America, land somewhere in Maryland and begin their take over of America. I would argue that the average right-winger viewer actually HOPES to be involved in a "24" episode in real-life. The temptation to torture is too great to resist.
Since 9/11, torture has become almost a form of entertainment much like gladiator battles were to ancient Rome. There is a sense that the average right-winger could not care any less whether a suspected terrorist is innocent or not; the simple fact that they are of darker skin and speak Arabic is justification for a Spanish Inquisition-style torture. Our forefathers would shake their heads in disgust, shame and disbelief.
Bottom line: the average right-winger believes that "24" is reality. Which would beg the question: how in the heck did America stay safe while Kiefer Sutherland was doing time for his DUI arrest?


Believing al-Qaeda was always in Iraq

Although tens of thousands of pages of intelligence have been submitted, along with dozens of military intelligence analysts going on record to state it, the average right-winger believes, rather KNOWS, that al-Qaeda have been in Iraq for decades. How do they know this?
Because al-Zarqawi, the red-headed stepchild of al-Qaeda, got medical treatment from a hospital in Iraq one month before the Iraq invasion. Match point, I guess. This falls under that umbrella of "truthiness". The same people who told us that there were WMD in Iraq and that they knew where they were planted this gem of information into the right-wing world. It shot around like a super ball on crack and now every average right-winger holds on to that tidbit like a 5 year old girl hugs her teddy bear. Problem: Saddam would have killed Zarqawi had he known he was anywhere in Iraq. Saddam thought al-Qaeda to be much too radical and that they attracted too much attention. The ONLY agreement Saddam had with any organization was this: "if you come across any stray nuclear weapons, I'll buy them from you at any price and if you come into Iraq I'll cut your f#$%^& head off!"
Al-Qaeda is in Iraq because we took out Saddam. End of story.

Believing Saddam was involved in 9/11 (select few, usually in rural areas)

16% of average right-wingers still believe that Saddam was behind 9/11. This demographic usually falls into the rural areas of America in communities no larger than 2,000 inhabitants. There may be one or two people who have a computer in these towns but they refuse to tell the other 1,900 + people that Saddam had nothing to do with 9/11.

Believing that violating the Constitution is a fantastic way to fight terrorism

Perhaps the most frightening pleasure of the average right-winger. They are perfectly content with illegal wiretaps, the elimination of habeas corpus, torture, racial profiling, illegal detentions, denial of rights and the multiple executive orders that give Bush control of each state's National Guard and the power to accuse any American of being an "enemy combatant".

You will usually hear the average right-winger say, "Well, if you ain't got nuttin' to hide, whadda ya worried about?" Little do they know this is how Nazi Germany began its ascent to a totalitarian state. The average right-winger, as I've mentioned several times before, normally lacks an education for whatever circumstance. That is no judgment on them. They cannot see the dangerous correlation between "they hate us for our freedom" and the fact that the Bush Crime Family has taken away more of our freedoms than al-Qaeda could have ever done in a thousand years. One person losing their rights is everyone losing their rights.
Bush once said, "The Constitution is just a god-damned piece of paper". That statement could very well have transcended the population that believes he is more intelligent than they are.
When you have bludgeoned a population with the club of patriotism you can accomplish almost anything.

As Benjamin Franklin once said, "If we restrict liberty to attain security we will lose them both."

How the Right kidnapped the military --- GOP + USM = CQB

It has become increasingly clear to me that the average conservative supporter of the Global War of Terror knows more about the military, the Iraq war, the missing WMD's, insurgent snipers, Humvees (the ill-equipped ones and the better-equipped ones) than, well, everyone else on the planet. Even those who were virtually disinterested in military affairs have become "synthetic soldiers" in post-9/11 America. Now, I'm not talking about the enlisted soldier, I'm referring to the "next-door neighbor" type who has become enamored with everything military.

You may encounter these individuals in the blogosphere but you may run into them in real life as well. This demographic is the one that found "Shock and Awe" to be orgasmic, the one that would thoroughly enjoy invading another country and showing anyone that "these colors don't run." They use a wide array of acronyms that display their superior knowledge in a field that is apparently useful only in a foxhole or seated in an armored tank.

Here are some general example that you and I could comprehend fairly easily:

SCOTUS = Supreme Court of the United States
POTUS = President of the United States
CiC = Commander in Chief
DoD = Department of Defense
CO = Commanding Officer
HVT = High-value target (probably used for Bin Laden when we were looking for him)

Apparently there are several "initialisms" that to lovers of the military and bombs are really amusing. Such as these:

BOHICA = bend over here it comes again
AWR = Allah's Waiting Room (when insurgents are in a building and an air-strike has been called in)
INI= Intoxication and intercourse (other than throwing puppies over cliffs these are other activities performed when not on duty)
USMC = Uncle Sam's Misguided Children


The list can go on for pages. The bottom line is that this vernacular has ceased to remain within the confines of the military and has spilled over into the general population that is supportive of war. Not only did the Bush Crime Family divide the country in such a way that pitted American vs. American, it also created a sub-culture that is absolutely fascinated and mesmerized by guns, tanks, bullets, bombs, death and destruction. I envision many of them watching movies like Red Dawn and Top Gun on a weekly basis. And to think this all started with 19 geeky terrorists who got lucky one day...

This love for all things military has created alter egos in many of this brethren. I've witnessed countless in the blogosphere who either claim to have fought in Iraq or Afghanistan and in reality have not (but so desperately want to fit in using some of the above acronyms) or claim to have a relative or friend that is in the military and that relative or friend was part of the team that found Saddam or was part of the team that "found the WMD but can't talk about it for 5-6 years...so yes, Iraq had WMD".

These terms and expressions are commonplace for the average right-winger. They use these expressions in forums or in an e-mail or in simple conversation. When the other party is not familiar with the expression, this is the opportunity they've been waiting for. They are all too excited to explain to Mr. or Mrs. Ignorant Civilian what these acronyms stand for or what the expression really means, its origin and how they are intrinsically tied to the expression.

Yes, the right has hijacked the military much like the Bush Crime Family has hijacked our Constitution. This is not a surprise. We've seen it in the past with countries like Germany in the 1930's and Italy in the late 1920's, early 1930's. A steroidal sense of nationalism combined with a dangerous lack of education produces this type of citizen. They are usually the easiest to convince and buy into nearly every form of propaganda.

Those that oppose war as the first option, like myself, will continue to honor the military and the service the men and women so courageously offer.

I still firmly believe, and hopefully will always believe, that the concept of a military is to defend our country rather than to create an empire.

"I wish I knew how to quit you..."

There's something about this photograph that gives me the chills.
It could be the placement of McCain's left hand or the senator's head buried in Bush's neck as a possible effort to smell the strong, sinister scent of that neocon cologne known as "Deception No. 9".

In any case, it's odd that you would find that kind of affection coming from a man who was swift-boated by Bush (Rove) in the 2000 election. McCain appeared to be on course to get the nomination and then ...((((ROAR)))) ...the Neocon lion awoke from his slumber and decimated his prey with a single, fierce blow. There were war plans to execute and nice guy McCain simply lacked the heart (morals, ethics, brains, conscience, soul) to do it. So now that nearly 8 LONG, damaging, divisive, deceptive, murderous, hateful years have passed, the "nice guy" is back and is closing in on a real opportunity to live in the White (Guy's) House for 4 or more years.

But not so fast, Sheriff! The neocons ain't havin' none of that "no torture, think first" kinda attitude 'round here.

McCain has been "waterboarded" by his own Republican (apologies to the man from Dixon, IL) party. I use "Republican" simply as an adjective to describe that political party which is not Democrat. Everyone knows that the Republican party has been hijacked by the neocons (Project for New American Century---William Kristol and the other fascist hobbits) and Jack Bauer is the only one who can save us (if only Kiefer Sutherland didn't get that last DUI and have to do jail time, we'd have been out of this mess a lot sooner). McCain was tortured as a POW in Vietnam. That is why he is against torture now (that will soon change).

The torture his own party has put him through is in the very early stages. His rhetoric has gotten significantly more aggressive; he's mentioned about being in Iraq for 100 + years, going to war with Iran, promising that there "will be more wars" (neocons had to smoke a cigarette after hearing that declaration) and basically underscoring that Bush's policies that have worked so incredibly well will remain in place to ensure the continued destruction of American principles.

McCain has become the "mascot/little brother/kid who will do anything to make friends/water boy" for the neocons. McCain knows he can't get elected without them and he's 71 and not likely to make another run (unless he is going to campaign between the hours of 4am and 4:30pm). At this point, everything is on the table for negotiation: more wars, increased torture, more revoking of civil liberties, ...did I mention more wars?

So what is McCain prepared to do? Well, get ready for the ultimate sell-out. Those who have followed the "Straight Talk Express" (funny name...I mean, what's the opposite? Gay Talk Express?) for many years have become accustomed to the senator's open-mindedness and thoughtful approach to politics. He's known for reaching across the aisle frequently and he's often gone against party lines in hard line issues like immigration.

But that will change now. Pay close attention and you will see McCain ratchet up the war threats, the fear-mongering and he may even let slip out which country will be the 2009 recipient of American democracy (Bombs Away!).

At least in 2000 the neocons got a gift from Texas in the form of a doltish, aphonic idiot who had the "audacity of arrogance" after running numerous businesses in the ground and setting the record for most executions under a governor (experience needed to become president...this is where Obama is lacking).

But in 2008 you will get the chance to watch the metamorphosis of a man who will trade his moral compass and his character for an agenda that is against America, her principles, her forefathers and her Constitution. An agenda that is potentially so catastrophically damaging to this country that many U.S. citizens are making preliminary plans to leave our country until the smart people start running things again.

I'm tired of being afraid and I want my Constitution back.

What difference does it make to the dead, the orphans and the homeless, whether the mad destruction is wrought under the name of totalitarianism or the holy name of liberty or democracy? ---Mahatma Gandhi, "Non-Violence in Peace and War"

Do we even care about truth?

As I inexplicably watch the post-Republican debate discussion on MSNBC as if it were a cheesy '80's movie, I think back to a line I heard today on talk radio. A noted talk radio hostess asked, when discussing the Iraq war, "Do we even care about truth?" The question has circled my mind all day. I began to think about the people I know: friends, family, colleagues. I wondered if they think about this stuff as much as I do or if, when confronted with news of more lies by the White House administration, do they even get curious?
Do they feel anything at all?


What is accepted as fact today is that we illegally invaded and currently occupy the former sovereign nation of Iraq, that this country did not have weapons of mass destruction nor was involved in 9/11, that Iraq did not pose an imminent threat to the United States, and that Iraq was not a sponsor of al-Qaeda. How is it then that few, if any, even give this a second thought?

I often wonder if the age of technology has disengaged the part of the brain that is responsible for the concern for truth. I have often been involved in conversations with friends or family members regarding the Iraq war. I have listed FACTS in bullet-point fashion, with numbers, statistics and data. They simply nod, agree that it's troubling but then shrug it off with a, "Well...whadda ya gonna do? You wanna get a coffee?"(as they send another text message...)

I don't ever remember my parents being terribly concerned with these type of issues, either. My formative years were during the mid '80's when Reagan was president. If you lived in a nice, safe neighborhood with lots of other white people, as I did, life was grand.

I do remember my grandfather though, who when in front of the television would briefly catch something of breaking news or bits of the State of the Union speech, he would listen and watch attentively and then mumble something under his breath. I recall seeing his face many times either with a look of disgust and a shake of his head or with a look of hope followed by a inconspicuous smile.

This period in our history is one in which I would have enthusiastically discussed these matters with my late grandfather. Would he care to know what I have learned regarding this debacle in Iraq? Would he be interested to know how many people have profitted financially from this war? Would he be outraged to see that ExxonMobil has reported the all-time greatest profit recorded by any company since the beginning of time? That President Bush only last week asked Saudi Arabia to increase oil production because, "our citizens are having a bit of a hard time..."? Did my grandfather understand what "war" really entails? Would he be against this war?

When I refer to truth, I am referring to it in the most natural sense: what is considered to be the supreme reality and to have the ultimate meaning and value of existence. Often Republicans like to debate intuition, speculation or "truthiness"(things that a person claims to know intuitively or "from the gut" without regard to evidence, logic, intellectual examination, or facts).

George Piro, the FBI agent who was responsible for interrogating Saddam Hussein, will appear on "60 Minutes". Piro learned during his many conversations with Saddam that the Iraqi dictator did not think the U.S. would seriously attack or invade Iraq. Saddam admitted to Piro that he DID NOT HAVE ANY WMD but refused to admit that to the world because he was fearful that Iran would seize an opportunity to invade Iraq. Wow...talk about not having a way out! The U.S. was going to invade Iraq whether they had WMD or not and Iran would attack if the U.S. didn't. And with us being the world's only superpower, the best we could come up with was to invade, bomb and occupy a country based on "truthiness".


So, my question to anyone reading this is, "Do you care about truth?"

If Iowa is a snapshot of America...

Then we may be able to draw these conclusions....

1) Hillary is under the impression that most people like her when in reality they don't. The cackle, the arrogance, her dogmatic manner in engaging the issues which underscores her feelings of superiority, the fact that she voted for the war --- I believe many people view her as "Bush-Lite" (1/3 less stupid with the same great lack of humility). She was not expecting third place in Iowa. But guess what? I didn't expect a "B" in history my junior year in college.
Advice: Don't fake regional accents, do a self-inventory and see what's not working, change it and work harder. Get a new hair style and add color to it.
Prediction: She will run again in 2012.

2) Barrack Obama is hands-down the front runner for the Democrats. When he speaks he motivates people. No other candidate, on either side, has that flair. His oratorical skills are hypnotic.
To win as an African-American candidate in Iowa is like getting Dick Cheney to smile: nearly impossible. Are there even any African-Americans in Iowa? If he takes New Hampshire, say good-night to Hillary. John Edwards may be Obama's Secretary of State choice, especially with his deep knowledge of African politics. Early prediction: Obama will take Jim Webb as his VP running mate. If that happens, Republicans have as much chance at winning the White House as George Bush does at learning the electric slide.
Advice: Get Spike Lee, Prince and Cornel West to endorse you. You will need the black vote and need it to be present at the polls.

3) John Edwards is trying too hard. His ideas are progressive and attractive. When he goes into long-winded explanations I feel as though he believes we have difficulty understanding the English language. I get it Johnny. The health care issue is killing you. We know that you will fight for health care for all Americans. I'm thrilled, really. Talk more about getting Bin Laden and getting out of Iraq.
Advice: Just be yourself, get that lid messed up once in a while, throw some dirt on those Haggar slacks and eat some ribs, damn it! And get your haircut at an African-American barber shop.
Prediction: When he retires from the race, he will get emotional.

4) Rudy Giuliani is as empty as a beer can at a Friday night fish fry at the Elk's Club in Milwaukee. If the election were based on the person physically closest to the first of the 9/11 attacks, Rudy would win. Thank God that's not the case. He is a one-trick pony. Even the FDNY is not backing him. That says something, especially when you claim you were hunting for survivors next to the brave men and women who actually were there doing it.
Rudy has a deranged foreign policy adviser in Norman Podhoretz, who is not helping the Rudy Train. Norman has been busy praying for war with Iran since the NIE came out which stated that Iran had stopped its nuclear weapons program 5 years ago. (see my other post about this)
Advice: Quit bringing up 9/11 like you're some kind of superhero and just join the Mafia, it's one of the few organizations that could care less how many girlfriends and/or ex-wives you have.

5) Fred Thompson makes me sleepy. In order to be my president, you need more than a cowboy hat and a faint southern accent. I think Fred thought he would show up and dust the other guys off without having to stay up past 6PM. Not quite. Mike "Forrest Gump" Huckabee just handed you your lunch and Mitt Romney will cut it up into smaller bites so you can eat it.
Advice: Lose the cowboy hat, admit that you backed abortion rights as a lobbyist and explain why and get more publicity with old school Republicans like Jim Baker and Nic Brady.
Prediction: Fred will be back to daily 1PM naps by Valentine's Day. Good thing, too, because his wife is going to want more than a box of chocolates. And if Rudy is still creeping around....hey, he could get her free NYPD protection, you know!

5) Huckabee. The mere sound of his name makes me laugh. I picture him and Tom Sawyer eating worms and chasing each other around in straw hats with no shoes or socks. This guy doesn't believe in evolution and thinks that homosexuality is an aberration and unnatural. Hmmm...what do you say about that Mark Foley, Ted Haggard and Larry Craig? How about 3,000 years of human history? Last I checked, gays have the right to vote. We'll see how "unnatural" their ballots are in November.
Advice: Rely on other research material besides the Bible and quit with the subliminal hints in the ads (the HUGE cross in the background). The Roman Catholic Church in Vatican City for centuries had male sex slaves so just validate that homosexuality is not a choice and you might have a chance with the MTV vote.
Prediction: Huckabee is the fall guy, kind of like that really cool African-American guy in a mystery-suspense movie who the white screenwriter kills off first. The RNC is pimping him as the front runner to eventually supplant him with a candidate who is less evangelical but equally in line with those values (possibly McCain). Karl Rove, you are genius!

7) McCain is still the only true Republican. This is the only Republican that if elected would not make me want to move out of the country. I still think he is a very legitimate contender. He may not be the most dynamic speaker or have the best hair cut but he is still moving forward with his "diplomacy first, no torture" platform. That is attractive to the undecideds and to the moderates. If there is anyone who can speak on the subject of war, it's McCain. He is from Arizona so his illegal immigration platform ought to be considered more logical and reliable than that of any other candidates.
Advice: Get Sylvester Stallone to endorse you and get some of your war comrades to speak on your behalf. Show some dialog with Hispanic leaders to reinforce your commitment on immigration reform. And don't say that we'll be in Iraq for 100 years, that will get you unseated as senator in Arizona.

8) Mitt Romney is a great candidate. He supports Bush too much but no one is perfect. He is certainly the best-dressed and best-looking candidate. He was elected governor in a very liberal state. But he's Mormon and if I'm not mistaken, Fox News has unilaterally put Mormons on Bush's Axis of Evil list. If we had to put Iraqi generals on a deck of playing cards so that Fox News viewers could understand the war, you can bet that NO ONE on that side understands the modern day LDS religion. That being said, it's only a matter of time before Mitt throws in the towel. Too bad that we judge candidates before they speak.
Advice: Too late to go Catholic but give it a shot. Just claim you had some vision in a dream and God spoke to you. Worked for Bush in justifying his invasion of Iraq. Get a Boston accent, too. Another guy did that and won an election.
Prediction: It will be sad when he retires from the race. America is not prejudice, right?

Voter turnout for Iowa Caucus:
Democrats - 220,000
Republicans - 115,000

That is not good for the elephants.

If I had a crystal ball...

July of 2008: Clinton and Obama are battling for the Democrat nomination and McCain and Giuliani are duking it out for the Republicans

After the conventions: Obama vs. McCain

Next President: Not Ron Paul