Saturday, July 4, 2009

"4 yes votes and 1 'hell yeah' "...The Story of a Governor's Cabinet


Sarah Palin's press conference. Seriously? Was that not the most awkward 30 minutes of television you've ever watched? Forget O.J. and the white bronco. Forget Mark Sanford. This was the moment when even Larry the Cable Guy was scratching his head with hot barbeque tongs saying, "What in THEE hell did that woman jis say?"

There are times as a parent when you must teach your children a lesson. Friday July 3rd around noon Sarah Palin did your work for you. She taught all children that education is very important.
The most disturbing piece was this nugget:

"In fact, this decision comes after much consideration, and finally polling the most important people in my life - my children (where the count was unanimous... well, in response to asking:)
'Want me to make a positive difference and fight for ALL our children's future from OUTSIDE the Governor's office?' It was four "yes's" and one "hell yeah!" The "hell yeah" sealed it - and someday I'll talk about the details of that..."

So, just so I understand it, Palin "the average hockey mom" made the decision to resign as governor by polling the following think tank:

Todd Palin --- husband, commercial fisherman and snowmobile afficionado

Track Palin -- 20 yr old son, amateur hockey player

Bristol Palin ---18 yr old daughter, mother of infant born out of abstinence

Willow Palin --- 14 yr old daughter, unknown as no one has heard her speak

Piper Palin -- 8 yr old daughter, primary babysitter of Trig

Trig Palin --18 month old son who has Down's Syndrome

I'm not making this up. So...time for hypothetical scenario: Sarah Palin is President of the United States (I know but just play along anyway...) North Korea is set to test fire yet another missile and this time intelligence indicates that it could reach Hawaii. North Korea states if the missile is intercepted it will view it as a declaration of war. President Palin gets the 3am phone call. She's briefed on the situation and calmly hangs up the phone.

She then proceeds to wake up her advisors, cabinet members in whom she has unshakeable trust.

"TODD !!! TRACK !!!! BRISTOL !!!! WILLOW !!! PIPER!!! TRIG !!!! GET YER ARSES DOWN HERE WILL YA? WE GOT ONE OF THEM THERE SITUATIONS GOIN' ON !!!

AND IT AIN'T NO FULL COURT PRESS, YOU BETCHA!!!





3 comments:

Arclight said...

wow......that is about the only clever thing I can think of when reading this one.

Just when you thought we couldn't potentially have a president dumber than George Sr.'s boy.....

Yikes.

The Federalist said...

Yes, just when you think they hit rock bottom...they continue to dig.

Click

ForTheLoveOfPerfume said...

They're in the woooooooooooo! ;)